Finding Focus: Saving My 3 AM Self With Wind Down and Sleep

Our second child, now three months old, is different from our firstborn toddler, who became a steady sleeper pretty early on (I hear that chorus of duh's, parents of the Internet!). He prefers feedings every few hours (as so many babies do), so none of us sleeps particularly well.

After a 3 am feeding that often begins with some pretty intense wailing from our hungry little guy, I sometimes find myself wound up and can't immediately find my way back to sleep, despite how much I desire it.

Being awake, I sometimes feel pulled to unlock my iPhone and meander around various forums, Instagram, NYTimes, or other social media that generally do not help me relax. I know it's not great for me, and it's something I've been trying to change. Thankfully, the tool that has been the most helpful for me is a feature that came out in iOS 14 as part of the Wind Down and Sleep features Apple implemented. And, it's only gotten better with iOS 15's new Focus mode.

Adding Shortcuts to my Wind Down and Sleep Focus screens, I've created a few choices that give me the chance to make a better decision, causing me to pause for a moment before doom scrolling the night away. I've limited these to a few input and output options, including Kindle for slowing my brain down by reading a book and the opportunity to create a new document in Drafts or a new entry in Day One.

I'll write more about how I'm managing this on my iPad soon. Right now, my iPad is my go-to for Kindle, and while the Sleep and Wind Down features aren't as robust there, I'll share how I manage distractions on there as well.

These options are perfect and save me from my own bad choices. Decision fatigue is legit, and it hits hard at the end of a long day. As a tired dad, my instincts should be to give my brain a peaceful place to unwind after putting my kiddo back to bed, and I need all the tools I can get to help set me in the right direction and remind me that the dopamine hit of social media posts or the latest news can wait.

I suspect many people have discovered this feature as part of the powerful new Focus tools in iOS, iPadOS 15, and Monterey. Is that you? How are you using Focus, and how has it helped you? Drop me a note; I'd love to hear more about it.