Ted Lasso Returns to Apple TV+ on March 15th
I'm excited for the third season of Ted Lasso premiering on March 15th. There have been conflicting reports that this will be the final season. However, there's no mention of that on the Youtube page or in Apple's press release announcing the new season. British GQ has a rundown of the new season, including what those involved in the production say about the future (spoiler alert, no one knows for sure).
One of the aspects of British TV production that I've always enjoyed is the comfort with which they sometimes take lengthy breaks between series and use one-off specials to move the story forward. While it's fun to speculate if the show will continue and in what form that might take, I'm thrilled that one of my favorite shows is returning, and I hope the creative team does what serves the story best.
Weekly Quote: William Zinsser on Knowing When to Stop
The writer, editor, and teacher William Zinsser first published On Writing Well: An Informal Guide to Writing Nonfiction in 1976. It’s sold over a million copies, has been updated several times, and is a book I sincerely enjoyed. It ends where it should. There is no flourish or grand finale, just more of what Zinsser does so well, advice from an experienced and passionate writer to those seeking to learn from him.
This idea that the story will tell you where it wants to stop is true in many aspects of our lives. The ending is often there waiting in front of us and is frequently visible to others before we see it. But, once we do, it can be a relief, an end to searching or striving when it makes more sense to slow down and set our gaze upon a new beginning.
Testing Your Soundtracks With Jon Acuff
Jon Acuff is an author, keynote speaker, and podcast host. He is also an overthinker. In the first chapter of his book Soundtracks: The Surprising Solution to Overthinking, he shares this:
I was the king of someday, high on thought, low on motion about a litany of things I'd do eventually.
The someday mentality is familiar to many of us. Part of the desire to procrastinate is often associated with anxiety, and also with the dishonest thoughts that race through our brains. Those thoughts take up valuable space and energy and help fuel those anxious feelings.
In Soundtracks, Jon shares a short exercise he's developed to help us understand the difference between when our brain is offering helpful advice and when it's lying to us. The next time you deal with these type of thoughts, ask yourself these three questions:
Is It True?
So many of or thoughts aren’t even true. Ask someone you trust if what your thinking has any basis in reality.
Is It Helpful?
This question is my favorite. Is the soundtrack helping you move the needle or holding you back? As Jon writes, "Does it lead to a decision or limit a decision? Does it generate action or apathy?"
Is It Kind?
According to Jon, the first two questions are less likely to catch a broken soundtrack because they tell convincing stories about how they've been helpful.
When you hear the broken soundtrack, ask yourself how you feel. Are you encouraged, or do you feel defeated Jon writes that the most important thing to remember is that soundtracks are kind and not judgmental.
Oh, Well…
Once we realize we're deep in a negative soundtrack, Jon shares some research on how to find the way out from Dr. Herbert Benson. The first option is to repeat something positive. The second and one I've used more regularly is to say "oh, well" when the distraction comes. This mantra can take the bite out of those negative thoughts and help move our thinking and attention forward.
Reading Soundtracks Can Help Defeat Baseless Thoughts
Soundtracks is much more than these three questions. Jon is funny and offers actionable advice and some context that reminds us we are all in this together. I read it a few years ago, and it's been helpful as I understand how often my brain produces baseless negative thoughts. I'm tuning that signal-to-noise ratio to something I control more, and Jon's book has helped with that.
Most people deal with this from time to time. If you are among this group, Soundtracks is worth reading.
The February Newsletter Arrives Next Week
The February newsletter will be going to subscribers on Tuesday. This month I’m writing about wishful thinking verses planning, sharing some new gear in my studio and recommending a show that has definite Ted Lasso vibes.
You can join here. If you do or already have, thank you, and I hope you enjoy it!
Weekly Quote: Steven Pressfield on Understanding What Scares Us
This week’s quote from The War of Art by Steven Pressfield reminds us that it’s difficult because it’s important and meaningful, maybe more so than we realize. I read The War of Art every year because of how much perspective it offers. You should read it, too, because you have a calling no matter who you are or what you do.
Fear-Setting with Tim Ferriss: How to Define Your Fears Instead of Your Goals
Around this time last year, I found a TED talk by the author and podcaster Tim Ferriss on fear-setting. I've done the process a few times, including over the last few weeks, to decide on a career opportunity.
Fear-setting, inspired by the Stoic concept of premeditatio malorum (Latin for the pre-meditation of evils), is an exercise to overcome paralysis by visualizing the worst-case scenarios that might happen.
Let's walk through it:
Page 1: What If I…
You start the process with the define column, listing the worst things that could happen. Tim recommends 10 or 20 scenarios at most.
The prevent column is where you review the actions you can take to decrease those above worst possible outcomes from happening, even if only by a small measure.
Finally, you consider how to repair. If the worst happens, who can help you, and how can you fix it. As mentioned in the video, a helpful thing to recall is that someone less driven than you has probably dealt with a similar situation and gotten through it at some point in history. Context can be the best equalizer for an overactive brain.
Page 2: What might be the benefits of an attempt or partial success?
This helps you figure out how taking action can help you move the needle and develop or grow in the ways you want.
Page 3: The Cost of Inaction
The final piece looks deeply at the cost of inaction, which is a novel but effective way to gain motivation and one that we rarely give enough attention to. We often assume things will get better, an idea that Tim refers to as optimistic denial.
The fiction may be that If we stay at the same job, it's bound to get better and pay us more without us doing anything to make the change happen.
We want to believe it to be true. It usually isn't. Before committing or saying no to a new opportunity, here's your chance to fully realize that.
The question asked here is simply If I avoid doing this action, what does my life look like in 6 months, 12 months, and three years? You are trying to avoid what Tim calls the atrocious cost of the status quo.
Meet a Real Life Stoic
Stick around for the last few minutes of the talk, where Tim introduces Jerzy Gregorek. Jerzy is a remarkable man who was part of the solidarity movement in Poland and was forced to flee to the United States. Now living a comfortable life in California, Tim asked him about Stoicism. Jerzy sent a lengthy text about how he uses Stoicism to help make his most difficult decisions. He also shared this thought:
“Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life.” - Jerzy Gregorek
About that Job
I decided not to take it. This process helped me lay out the benefits and costs. I would work with some great people, help shape and influence the culture, and build a solid pathway to more senior positions, but the commute was too far. I've done it before, and spending hours in the car covering many miles every day doesn't work for me now.
I had to make a choice to say no to something I wanted to do and would have been great at. It was not easy.
Jerzy and Tim are on to something here. Try this process the the next time you have an important decision to make.
Weekly Quote: The 12 Week Year on The Power of Daily Actions
This week’s quote comes from The 12 Week Year: Get More Done in 12 Weeks than Others Do in 12 Months, by Brian P. Moran and Michael Lennington.
This idea put forth by Moran and Lennington isn’t new, but it’s helpful to be reminded of a simple fact: What you do now impacts your future. So do yourself a favor and invest in your present to improve your outcomes. You will be better for the effort.
Sick Week x3 (Thoughts on Sick Time at Work)
As a leader, I've taken a realistic approach to my team members' needs when caring for their kids. Even before I had children, it was apparent how difficult balancing work and parenting was, and I didn't want to make it more complicated. I remember seeing the relief from team members when I would talk about finding them some flexibility when a child was sick. The rest of the team would often be at the ready, already aware of the situation and offering to fill in the gaps.
The business need is a fundamental consideration; I know that. What's also true is that there is often more flexibility than we realize, especially when the leader builds a team on foundations of respect and collaboration. People want to help each other, and those who gain from this don't usually forget it. They often repay the favor when called upon, building upon a network of goodwill that can elevate a team to be more effective and robust. The business does better when the teams take care of each other, and that starts with the leader authentically modeling empathy and flexibility.
These thoughts came to mind because I'm coming off a three-week period where a wave of sickness hit everyone in the house. My full-time job is to stay home with one of our kids, so it kept me busy. Of course, my wife, who works full time, also did an incredible amount in addition to her demanding job. If you have kids, you know everyone is wiping noses and cuddling between sales presentations and Zoom calls. Your children don't care if you are working, and that's particularly true if you're doing so remotely. They need you.
We're on the other side of it now, with the children healthy and my wife and I back to our usual selves. While this, by definition, isn't a job because it doesn't pay the bills, it is an integral part of my personal and professional life, and I'm taking my own advice to get back to it. So I'm in the studio again, and even though my daily time for creating is limited, it's good to be back.
Thanks for being patient. There's more coming.
Seneca’s Most Powerful Quotes From The Daily Stoic
The Daily Stoic has released a beautifully produced video featuring dozens of quotes from Seneca that I just spent the last five minutes enjoying. If you have a few quiet minutes, take a look. I’ll be sharing more from the Stoics in the coming months, so stay tuned.
Weekly Quote: Ray Dalio on Progress From Pain
This week's quote comes from Ray Dalio, founder of Bridgewater Capital and author of a series of books about principles in life and business.
Mistakes are the language of growth, and we learn so much through productive struggle. There is a lot of power in trying and failing. It's where you better understand your potential and build upon your best self. While It can be a painful experience, one upside may be how much you grow when you come out the other end. Remember that reflection is the key to finding growth and getting through the hard times. It’s how you learn, and how you prepare yourself for what’s to come.
Weekly Quote: Scott Galloway on Taking Uncomfortable Risks
This week’s quote comes from professor, author, and podcaster Scott Galloway on a recent episode of Pivot when asked to offer advice to someone turning 30.
After my second child was born, I adopted a bias toward action. I have a family that needs me to take calculated risks, and I know that ideas I think are worth exploring will go nowhere if I don’t act. What’s the worst that will happen? I might fail or be embarrassed. Who cares? I have more perspective now, and I often consider the words of Kara Swisher, Scott’s cohost on Pivot and a well-regarded journalist, that we will not be here in 100 years.
Take Galloway’s advice. Don’t be foolish, but know that being uncomfortable can be the ticket to transformation.
Finding Focus: Staying on Track With Dark Noise
Since launching this site, most of my writing has been done either in the early morning or while my two kids nap. I often play music and there is always white noise playing for our kids while they sleep. Without realizing it, that sound has become a foundation for my focus state and my writing process. While I like having white noise on in the background, The mono speaker on most baby monitors isn’t very good, with sound quality not being high on the list of features.
I’ve been aware of various white noise apps and have used one version on the Amazon Alexa a few times, however I hadn’t tried one on my Apple devices. Timing is everything apparently because as I was considering this, Episode 669 of my favorite tech podcast, the Mac Power Users featuring Charlie Chapman, the developer behind Dark Noise, was released. I downloaded his app while listening to the episode and have been using it since.
What is Dark Noise
Dark Noise is an ambient noise app for iOS and Mac. Its developer, Charlie Chapman, is the kind of app developer I am happy to support. He is also an artist, designer, and podcaster who’s been working on iOS and Mac Apps for nearly a decade. During his appearance on Mac Power Users, Charlie shared his perspective on being an indie developer and spoke candidly with hosts David Sparks and Stephen Hackett about moving Dark Noise from a side gig to a full-time project, which would likely require it to become a subscription app. Clearly, he is not interested in a money grab and is thinking carefully about how to provide the best value for his customers.
My favorite Dark Noise feature is it’s simplicity. When you open the app on mobile, the last used sound is shown just above a large play button. There’s little else aside from the usual audio source picker and volume slider, a timer, and an option to select other sounds. Nothing gets in the way of you pressing play and getting on with whatever you need to do.
Dark Noise on iOS, Mac, and iPadOS. Image Courtesy of Dark Noise
On the Mac, the design is similarly clean and intuitive. I am a big fan of the adaptive toolbar design, which makes it easy to show only the controls and what’s currently playing. This makes managing precious screen real estate much easier.
The app offers a large variety of sounds, with 50 to choose from, including traditional white noise machine options and a significant variety of other environmental sounds like rain, wind chimes, fireworks, and even a spaceship engine. You can also mix the different sounds to customize the vibe you’re looking for, and on the Mac you can use it while listening to other audio sources as well.
How I Use It
I’ve been listening to Dark Noise while writing for the last month. I spent the first week listening to a custom mix of the thunderstorms and coffee shop sounds, while the last few weeks have had me alternating mostly between the heavy rain and grey noise options. I’m finding that the specific time of day or mood helps dictate what I want to listen to, and learning what fits best is fun to explore. I’ve also used Dark Noise a few times while doing household chores. Sometimes I want to listen to something but don’t want a podcast, audiobook, or music, and it’s great to have another option. I’m spoiled for choices.
Dark Noise has robust automation support for Siri and Keyboard Shortcuts and offers Widgets and Home Screen quick actions. I access my preferred sound quickly through a shortcut that lives on my iPad and iPhone Home Screen and on my Stream Deck for the Mac.
I know that the baby monitor won’t be in my home and studio in a few years. So while I have some feelings about my kids growing up (Parents, you get it), I’m pleased to know that I’ll have a beautifully designed app that offers a variety of sounds to help me focus created by an indie developer who wants it to stick around. Dark Noise is subtle enough to keep my mind from wandering without being distracting, and with all that’s vying for my attention, it’s refreshing to have this option.
Weekly Quote: Ryan Holiday on Realizing Your Full Potential
This week’s quote is from Discipline is Destiny by Ryan Holiday.
It's bad enough to let someone else down, but letting yourself down is a failure of possibility. It's a reminder of what you should be doing and who you might become. If that doesn't motivate you to stretch and reach your potential, I'm not sure what will.
Ted Gioia’s 8 Best Techniques for Evaluating Character
The writer and jazz musician Ted Gioia recently offered his insights on best evaluating someone's character via his Substack, The Honest Broker.
From the article:
The careful application of these techniques has saved me a lot of heartache and agita. My dealings with people tend to be positive nowadays, and mostly because I've put a lot of effort into ensuring that they are good, trustworthy people. This is valuable both on the upside and downside.
I've become a quick fan of Ted's writing and will save this for regular review because it's full of helpful advice that's easy to forget. You may want to do the same.
Weekly Quote: Morgan Housel on the Journey of Ideas
This week’s quote comes from Morgan Housel on LinkedIn. Morgan is the author of The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness.
Remember this quote the next time you’re setting out to do something. You are rarely “first” to a concept, and your work isn’t immediately invalidated if it’s been explored previously. People interested in you want more of you, and you’ll undoubtedly bring that through your perspective. Part of the success in anything is how you get to the result. Act as an authentic guide for your reader or audience on the trip; it won’t matter how often the road has been traveled because you are there with them.
It’s Quit Day, Change Your Mindset and Keep Going
From Inc Magazine:
Research conducted by Strava using over 800 million user-logged activities in 2019 predicts the day most people are likely to give up on their New Year's Resolution is January 19. (Strava calls it "Quitter's Day.")
There it is. According to Strava's data, today is the day you will most likely give up on the resolutions you set at the end of last year. But you don't have to be a part of that statistic. Instead, you can honor your intentions of improving or changing in ways that help you by reframing the process and adjusting your mindset.
Try this:
Change from the resolution mindset to a habit-building one. If you're trying to do something this year, take it in small increments, make a plan you can realistically follow, celebrate your wins, and give yourself grace when you miss the workout or don't write in your journal like you wanted. It happens, don't let that be an excuse for giving up on something important.
How are you doing? Let me know, and stick with it.
From the Newsletter: 3 Tips for Starting Again
Every month, I send a short (approx. 5-minute read time) email with behind-the-scenes insights into what I'm working on, share a media recommendation, and offer tips, ideas, or quotes that can help keep you motivated. If that sounds like something you’d enjoy, you can subscribe here.
To give you an idea of what to expect in your inbox if you do subscribe, you can read the December issue in full here. Additionally, I'm sharing a piece from the November issue that may be helpful if you've fallen off a little on those new habits you're trying to build in 2023. The backstory is that I had just come through a tough month with my entire family getting sick, and I wanted to share three simple tips I used to get back on track.
Here you go:
1. Be Kind to Yourself
Start with this idea: Everyone goes through periods like this.
Even the most organized and accomplished person sometimes loses the thread through no fault of their own. Practice being kind to yourself and those around you. You will be tired, so negative self-talk will get louder. Prioritize sleep when you can, and try to maintain even a tiny aspect of your daily routine. That journaling habit I keep talking about can also help keep you on track.
2. Pick a Date to Start Back up
Once things return to normal, pick a day on the calendar and get back to some form of your normal schedule. Once my kids started sleeping again, I got back into getting up early to spend some time writing. If my job right now weren't a stay-at-home dad, I know I would have less control over this. Even if you work full-time, picking a date to anchor yourself is a good idea.
3. It Will Happen Again
The return to normal will probably be temporary. Things do not always go the way we plan, and how you deal with that matters. Practice the first principle of Stoicism (see the quote below); you cannot control what happens, but how you react is up to you. I'm only sometimes great at this, but remembering this helps me reset my perspective when things are challenging.
You can do it. Just remember to be kind to yourself, give yourself a break, and get back to it.
I’m enjoying the creative process of building the newsletter as a companion for the blog, and I’ve gotten some nice comments about it from readers which I so appreciate. If you’re interested you can join here to get it delivered to your inbox at the end of every month.
Weekly Quote: Henry Miller on Finishing What You Start
Taking the advice to finish one thing at a time from the novelist and literary trailblazer Henry Miller isn’t easy. You are constantly bombarded with notifications and distractions, even when you sleep. So if it feels like your brain craves dopamine, it probably does. The world is complex as people find their way forward despite round after round of layoffs, a challenging economy, rising prices, and international strife. With all that’s happening, it might feel like you don’t stand a chance.
But you do.
It may not be as simple as Miller suggests, and few of us have complete control over our time or the unfettered ability to decide where we focus our attention. But you can probably find thirty minutes or an hour most days, which can be your time to get the important thing done.
Whether you find that hour at home, perhaps before everyone else wakes up, or find a few hours to block schedule your calendar at the office when you can say no to meetings, one thing remains true: It takes planning and energy to stay focused and get something done, but it’s worth it. Doing a little planning and then building the habit of sticking with it can make all the difference in finishing something meaningful.
Take a look at the calendar right now and ask yourself this critical question, where is your time?
Weekly Quote: The Daily Creative on Communicating Expectations
At the end of 2022, my friend Jim Eagar, the writer behind the Original Mac Guy, shared a few quotes from the Daily Creative: Find Your Inspiration to Spark Creative Energy and Fight Burnout by Todd Henry. The ideas resonated with me, and I started the new year by adding this book to my daily reading habit.
Except for my current hiatus from work as a stay-at-home dad, I've spent the last couple of decades leading people. One of the most important lessons I have learned about developing team dynamics and reducing frustration and confusion is if expectations aren't shared with clarity and agreed upon by all involved, it's mostly down to luck whether the message will get through. I've yet to speak to a senior leader or read any books on leadership and personal development that follow that technique, and unsurprisingly don’t recommend it here either.
If you’re asking someone to do something, it is your responsibility to make sure there is a conversation and the expectations are clear, otherwise any conflict that may arise is on you.
The Daily Stoic Kindle Edition is on Sale
The Kindle edition of The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living is on sale for a great price today. I’ve been reading this book on a near-daily basis for several years in both hardcover and Kindle. I recommend it to anyone interested in stoicism and personal development. It’s a page or two of wisdom each day that can help shape things for the better.